This is something I wrote a long time ago and found yesterday.
...how I wished I could see the Katelyn he told me he could see.
He sees a confident, funny, brilliant woman. He sees a desireable woman. He sees absolute beauty, unfailing intelligence, and an indescribable radiance.
I see the new pimple on my face.
I see every letter I have not had the discipline to write. I see the fifteen pounds I always want to lose. I see the extra mile I do not run, the dessert I do not avoid, and the sugar I am addicted to. I see all the times I felt awkward and could not think of anything intelligent to say. I see my hair out of place.
I see the moments I loved that escpaed me. I see the desperate need I had to convice everyone I am worthy of... anything. I see every mistake I ever made, every time I was unfair, every time I lost my temper, and every time I didn't try hard enough. I haven't quite figured out how to see radiance through all that
dark
cloudy
shit.
2 comments:
very good and so universal.
i haven't decided if i would really want to know what everyone else was seeing.
Ya, I think about that when I'm people-watching and making snide little remarks about his jacket or her hair... then, I think, I wonder what he or she would say about me if I was walking by???
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